The Bittersweet Lullaby
by supernaturalfreakk
Summary: Clary doesn't go out much. Simon drags her to a club one night, and there she meets Jace. There's just something about him she can't quite put her finger on..
1. Life As We Knew It

"Oh, come on, Simon! Why on Earth would I want to go to a club?" I said into my phone.

"Even if we don't go to Pandemonium, we still have to go somewhere. You haven't been outside in a month." Simon stated. Simon had been my best friend since we were six. I could tell him pretty much anything and everything. But it was summer, and I didn't really enjoy the heat. He didn't seem to understand that very well. I guess he did have a point, though. I really hadn't been outside in a while. "Plus, it sounds like fun." I could almost see him smiling through the phone. He knew he'd won.

"Alright." I sighed, defeated. "What time?"

"Victorious!" he announced. "How 'bout I pick you up at nine?"

"'Kay."

I hung up the phone and got out of my bed. It was almost noon. I walked into my bathroom, and gasped. What was on top of my head? I though red-heads were supposed to be envied among the hair color world? Well, I couldn't imagine _anyone_ envying this. Wow, brushing it didn't help at all. I gave up and went into the kitchen. I dug in the fridge and settled for frozen waffles, Lucky Charms, and a glass of milk. Then I plopped down on the couch and turned on the TV. _Rugrats_ was on! If Simon knew I still watched _Rugrats_, I'd never live it down. After a while, I hopped in the shower. I dried off and walked into my thankfully large walk-in closet. I sighed. I had no idea what to wear.

I spent _forever _digging through clothes, trying to find something someone would wear to Pandemonium. After much debate, I decided on a fitted plain black t-shirt, denim skinny jeans with a black-studded belt, and black high heels. As, for my hair…I blow-dried it and let it hang in long, loose curls. I chose dark eye-shadow and then carefully lined my eyes, followed by mascara. _Not bad_, I thought to myself. I twirled around, thinking I looked older than nineteen.

As I was admiring my reflection, my phone rang. I checked the caller ID. It was Simon.

"Yes?" I answered.

"Sheesh, I was just calling to tell you that Eric wants the band to practice for a little while, so I'll just meet you at the club. Cool with you?"

"Yeah, okay."

"Good. See ya soon."

I grabbed my black leather jacket and my keys then walked outside. It felt pretty good outside, actually. I climbed into my Orange VW Bug, and was on my way.


	2. Pandemonium

I walked into the club and sighed. I scanned the crowd, wondering if Simon was already here, but there were too many people to tell. So I walked over to the bar and sat down. The music here was loud and upbeat. There was a boy sitting next to me, and he was gorgeous. He had porcelain skin, hair as black as ink, and vivid blue eyes. He caught me staring at him, and said, "Hey, I'm Alec." He held out his hand. I looked at him and took it in mine.

"Clary." I said.

"So...Come here often?" I joked.

"Every night." He said with a smile. He saw my confusion and said, "My best friend performs here."

"Oh, that's nice of you."

"He's up next." He nodded toward the stage.

I looked over at the stage. There was a fat man currently occupying it and I think he was attempting to rap? It was kind of funny. The man was wearing an 'I Love My Girlfriend' t-shirt that had a picture of a Nintendo 64 underneath it. When he was finished, I clapped, just to be polite. So did Alec, I noticed. I twisted around in my seat and ordered root beer. I didn't drink alcohol much. While I sipped on my drink, people started screaming. I whipped around in alarm, hurting my neck. When I saw what they were screaming at, I forgot all about the pain in my neck and gasped.

And I thought Alec was gorgeous...I trailed off. The boy on the stage, Alec's friend, was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. He had a smile that lit up the club. Curly, golden hair, tawny eyes, tall, muscular...Beautiful. I couldn't take my eyes off him. Especially when I heard his voice… He sang Dangerous by Romance on a Rocketship.

_Girl, I can't notice but to  
Notice you, noticin' me  
From across the room  
I can see it and I can't stop myself from lookin' and  
Noticin' you, noticin' me  
Watch out, I've seen her type before_

_That girl is so dangerous  
(That girl is so) dangerous  
(That girl is a) bad girl  
(I've seen her type before, she's so) dangerous  
(That girl is so) dangerous  
(That girl is a) bad girl, yeah_

_Every night, man, I get that feeling  
Girl is about to got me stealing glances all the_ time  
_See, I wish you were mine_

_So we get close or to the fact  
And I see how you might act crazy all the time(are you out of your mind?)  
I got my friends a ride  
You're calling me all night  
Dragging you home, drugged from another Friday night_

_I guess I should have known  
Should I have left you alone?  
I wouldn't be singing it all_

_Girl, I can't notice but to  
Notice you, noticin' me  
From across the room  
I can see it and I can't stop myself from lookin' and  
Noticin' you, noticin' me  
Watch out, I've seen her type before_

_That girl is so dangerous  
(That girl is so) dangerous  
(That girl is a) bad girl  
(I've seen her type before, she's so) dangerous  
(That girl is so) dangerous  
(That girl is a) bad girl, yeah_

_So let me finish up this by saying  
That girls these days are praying  
And no, I don't mean church  
They're all set out to hurt  
So all my boys, just hide your hearts  
'Cause Cupid shoots to kill from the start, from the start_

_Girl, I can't notice but to  
Notice you, noticin' me  
From across the room  
I can see it and I can't stop myself from lookin' and  
Noticin' you, noticin' me  
Watch out, I've seen her type before_

_That girl is so dangerous  
(That girl is so) dangerous  
(That girl is a) bad girl  
(I've seen her type before, she's so) dangerous  
(That girl is so) dangerous  
(That girl is a) bad girl, yeah_

He smiled when he was finished. So did Alec. So did I. Everyone was screaming. It was great! He took a quick break and Alec leaned toward me.

"So what'd you think?" he asked.

"It was amazing!"

"Good." He smiled. "You can-

"Clary! Over here!" Simon yelled.

"Sorry. It was nice meeting you." I said softly.

"You, too. You should come back sometime." He replied.

"I just might. It was fun. Well, see ya."

I hopped down from my seat and walked over to Simon. Halfway there, I turned around and went back to where Alec was sitting. He smirked when he saw me.

"Hey, what was your friend's name?" I asked quickly.

"Jace." He said.

"Huh. Well, he sure has talent." Then I raced over to Simon again.

"Hey, how'd practice go?"

"Same old, same old. We still haven't come up with a name yet."

"How about Orange Comma Punch?" I asked excitedly.

"Not bad. I'll discuss it with the guys." He nodded.

Just then Simon latched onto my wrist and yelled, "I love this song!" And before I knew it, I was being dragged onto the dance floor. Simon was dancing like crazy while I just kinda stood there. I got used to the beat and started moving with the music. And then the stupid song ended.

"That was fun." Simon panted.

"Ha, yeah." I scoffed.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom." He announced.

While he did that, I noticed my eyes drifting back towards Alec. Who wasn't there. His friend, Jace wasn't on the stage either. I frowned. Weird. When Simon came back, we both decided to head home. I was awfully tired. I drove home, got in bed, and dreamed of Jace.


	3. No World For Tomorrow

_I was running through an alley way. It was dark outside, cold too, too cold for summer. There was something chasing me. It was huge and dark, and it smelled like death. I couldn't run any longer. Just then, I tripped over something, hit my head on the ground, and blacked out, but not for long. A few seconds later, I opened my eyes and saw him. Dressed in all black, his back was to me, but I knew it was him. And the thing that was chasing me was in front of him! I tried to tell him to run, but my mouth wouldn't move. He took something out of his pocket, said a name, and then there was a white explosion. My eyes finally adjusted, but everything was blurry. The thing wasn't there anymore. Neither was Jace._

I woke up, gasping for air. _Well, that certainly wasn't your everyday dream,_ I thought to myself sarcastically. I'd had that same dream every night for three nights now, ever since I'd first seen Jace. I sighed. I had no idea what it meant. I reached over on my nightstand to get my phone, and then I called Simon.

"Hey, Simon?"

"Yes?"

"Do you wanna go to Pandemonium tonight?"

"Whoa! Finally coming out of your shell, huh?"

"Very funny, Simon."

"Aw, I wish I could but the guys and I are having a Star Wars marathon tonight. I said I would go."

"Oh, okay."

"I'm sorry, Clary."

"No, it's okay. Really. Have fun."

"I'll try. "

I hung up the phone, feeling kind of down. I really wanted to figure out what these dreams meant, and the only way-I thought-was to see Jace again. Then I had an idea, I don't need Simon to go to Pandemonium.

. . . . .

When I got to the club, it was more crowded than usual. So, like I did before, I sat down at the bar, looking over at the stage. He wasn't up there.

"He doesn't perform until ten."

"Oh." I looked over and blushed at Alec, who had taken the seat next to me.

"I was going to tell you before, that I could introduce you. If you want." He smiled. He knew I wanted to.

"Um, okay. Yeah." I replied cleverly. But, what was I going to say? Hi, you don't know me, but I've had dreams about you for the past three nights? Oh, I was doomed. The lights dimmed, and the curtain opened. Then, the screaming began, and I knew it was time. He stepped out onto the stage, with a blinding smile. He was wearing a green and white striped polo and fitted jeans. You could tell he loved doing this. And then he said, "Hey, you guys! How's everyone doing tonight?" Lots of screaming. "Good, well I've been working on this song for a while, so here it goes." He took a deep breath. Then he started singing Bulletproof…I Wish I Was by Radiohead.

_Limb by limb and tooth by tooth,  
Tearing up inside of me  
Every day every hour  
I wish that I was bullet proof_

Wax me,  
Mould me  
Heat the pins and stab them in  
You have turned me into this  
Just wish that it was bullet proof

So pay the money and take a shot  
Lead fill the hole in me  
I could burst a million bubbles  
All surrogate and bullet proof

And bullet proof  
And bullet proof  
And bullet proof

He smiled as everyone screamed and clapped, and said, "Thank you! Now, I know I normally sing more songs, but I have some studying to do, so I can't tonight." People groaned. "I know, I know." He said. "Thanks, again. And have a good night!" He walked off stage. I felt someone pulling on my sleeve. "Come on!" said Alec. Reluctantly, I followed him. We walked through the crowd and through the backstage doorway. Jace was putting something into his bag. "Jace." He turned around. I gasped. He was more beautiful up close. He looked at Alec, who gestured to me. He finally looked at me and his eyes widened, but then he regained his composure. "Who's this?"

"This, is Clary. Clary this is Jace."

"A pleasure, I'm sure. But we have some, uh, studying to do, remember Alec?" said Jace, who had turned around and continued stuffing things into his bag.

"Oh, Right. Well, I met her the other night, and I just thought I'd introduce you two." Alec said smugly.

There was an awkward silence.

"Well, bye." I said, feeling a little humiliated, but I could take a hint. "Bye, Alec." He nodded at me, and I left Pandemonium. On my way home I thought about what just went on. Despite how Jace acted on stage, I didn't think he was being very nice. I also didn't think they were 'uh, studying.' But, hey, what did I know? I locked my apartment door, threw my keys on the counter, and climbed into my welcoming bed. And the dream began again.

**Sorry if this chapter stinks. I may be running out of ideas..Got any good ones? Please review! :)**


	4. If Only She Knew

A few days later, I decided to drop by Simon's place. I hadn't heard from him in a while. I'd tried calling him; no answer. I was starting to get worried. On my way to Simon's, I figured I'd drop by the library and get some new books. I parked my Bug and walked in the entrance. The lady behind the counter, Ms. Richardson, greeted me by name. I guess I came here a lot. I walked over to the Fantasy section and searched the shelves. Besides _Vampire Academy_, nothing looked interesting, so I decided to mix it up a bit and go to the 'Non-Fiction/Mythical Section'. I scanned through hundreds and hundreds of books, until this book caught my eye. It was huge, tattered, and torn. It looked like it really belonged in the 'Repair' section. I pulled it off the shelf and flipped it over. _The Mortal Instruments_. Hmm, never heard of it. I thought, _what the heck, I'll check it out_. I brought it over to the counter and Ms. Richardson rang it up on my account. "Hmm." She said.

"What's wrong?" I knew I didn't have late fees or anything.

"Well, this book isn't in the system."

I blinked. "Oh."

"I'm sorry, Clary, but I can't let you check this book out."

"No, it's okay."

I walked away and sat at one of the tables. I hadn't realized how much I'd wanted that book. I watched Ms. Richardson walk over to assist someone. I didn't have to think twice. I ran over, inconspicuously, grabbed the book off the counter, and walked hastily out the library door. I was half afraid the alarm was going to ring. But, thankfully it didn't. I kept walking towards my car. "It's not healthy to steal, you know." She walked up, with her hands on her hips. She was tall with long, black hair. She had bright blue eyes, and she was gorgeous. Her high heels were like…seven inches. She looked really familiar; even though I was positive I had never met this girl before. I just shrugged. I didn't know what to say, so I just hopped in my car and drove off. Out of my rearview mirror I saw her throw her hands up in frustration. But I just made my way to Simon's.

Jace's POV

"Alec, this is weird. You've only met her once." I protested, as we were walking down an alley way. It was a little past twelve and it felt amazing outside. The leather was kind of uncomfortable, I'd noticed.

"Twice, actually. And she's one of the few people I feel like I can trust. I don't know why, but I do." Alec said, giving me a hurt look.

"Whatever, Alec. It doesn't even matter." I turned away. I let out a breath I hadn't realized I had been holding.

Alec gasped. "I knew it! You feel it too, don't you?! I knew it!"

"Alec, shut up!" I said, looking around. "Yeah, I mean there's…something about her that's different, but I don't think I'd go that far. She'd freak if she knew. That's why we never tell anyone."

We walked back to the Institute in silence. He walked to his room, I walked to mine. He knew I was right. I usually was. But he was also right. I couldn't shake this feeling. I didn't want to be mean to her, but I couldn't risk her knowing. I plopped down on my bed, and sighed. I almost wished I could get to know her. She was really cute. But she deserved better than to be sucked into this world. For once, I actually wanted to go to sleep. Something was definitely going on, but right now, I didn't really care. Because, what Alec didn't know, was that every night since I'd met her, I'd dreamt of her, dreamt of…Clary...And he saw her once more:

_I was chasing it through an alley way at night. It was bigger than I remembered, and the stench was awful. It lead me into an open field. It was beautiful. I probably could have enjoyed it more if not for the huge demon I was hunting. The demon suddenly slowed, and I almost ran into it. I ran to get in front of the demon. I saw her lying on the ground, and I knew I had to kill this thing if it was the last thing I did. I felt bound to protect her. I turned toward the demon, took out my __seraph blade, and called its name. The look on the demon's face was priceless. And then it died. I turned around to check on Clary, she was unconscious. I picked her up and walked away into the night._

**Hey, did you like Jace's POV? Just thought I'd throw that in there. And I think I have an idea where this is going…maybe. Haha. Well please review! I'd appreciate it. Thanks!**


	5. Oh, Wait She Does Know

I opened up my newly stolen book. It was talking about Shadowhunters. Demon hunters. They had strange, black marks on their skin. I shut the book. I needed to read this when I had more time and concentration. I walked up to Simon's door and raised my hand to knock, but he opened the door first. He looked…different. I pushed that thought aside. "Do you need something?"

I blinked. "I was just…Are you okay?"

"Never better." He said, in a bored voice.

"Um, are you sure?" Simon had never treated me this way before. It wasn't like him.

"Yeah. Look, I don't think we should hang out anymore."

"…What?"

"Well, I've been thinking, and it's for the best."

"Okay." I whispered. And I walked off. I didn't break down until I got in my car. Why would Simon do something like that? I couldn't stop crying. Was there something wrong with me? It seemed like everyone I knew was treating me like shit. Someone knocked on my car window. "Hey, you okay?" It was Alec! I wrenched the car door open and threw my arms around him. I caught him off guard, and he almost fell over. Then he slowly put his arms around me, and waited until I was done. I pulled back and looked at him. His face was flushed. His hair was windblown, and his eyes were wild with worry. "What happened?" he said.

"My best friend since I was six said we shouldn't hang out anymore, because it was for the best."

"Hey, it's okay. Forget him. Come to Pandemonium with me."

I was too lonely to argue. I got back in my car and met him at the club. We sat in our usual seats, for a second. Then Alec took me backstage again, to talk to Jace. Jace was ready this time though.

"Alec, I told you-"

"Shut up, Jace. Go get Isabelle."

Jace didn't question. He went out the back door, and retrieved Isabelle, who was in the middle of kissing someone.

"What the hell, Jace?" She cried.

"Alec wants you." He said simply.

"Ohhhh." She understood.

They walked up to us, and I gasped. Isabelle was the girl who I saw outside the library. She smiled at me, she knew my secret.

"Hello there, Clary." She said.

"How do you know my name?" I asked, shocked.

She didn't answer. I looked at Alec.

"This is my sister, Isabelle." Oh, that's why she'd looked so familiar. She looked just like Alec.

I nodded.

"Clary, come here." It was Jace. I hesitantly walked toward him. He laughed. "I'm not going to hurt you."

He pulled me into a deserted practice room, and then he faced me.

"Okay, whatever they tell you, don't listen."

"Um…"

"You won't believe it anyway."

Then we walked back out to where Alec and Isabelle were. Alec looked kind of nervous.

"Jace, we have to go check something out on Landon Lane."

Jace nodded. "Clary, we'll see you soon." Then the three of them walked out the back door. Landon Lane was the road Simon lived on. I don't know why, but I decided to follow them. I walked outside and I could barely see them, so I fast-walked to get closer. This went on for about 30 more minutes, until they were in front of Simon's apartment. They huddled together, and then Jace pulled out a knife! They broke down his door, and walked in. I ran up the stairs, and into the doorway. They cornered Simon, and then I yelled. "What are you _doing_?!" All four of them looked at me. Jace's mouth turned into a snarl. "What is the mundane doing here?"

"Well, I followed you…And then I saw that you had a knife…"

"Clary, they were doing me a favor." Simon said irritably.

"Oh, really?" I said sarcastically. "Well I was just trying to help. Guess I'll just leave you to it, then."

I walked out calmly, and then ran to anywhere but there.

Jace's POV

I don't think she believed Simon. He really did ask us to kill him. I guess he didn't wanna be a vampire anymore. We were walking back to the Institute. It was hot outside, so I took off my shirt. As we walked past the park, we heard a noise. We ran over to check it out. It was Clary, of course. She had fallen out of her swing. She was looking at my chest. Hahaha. Oh, she was looking at my runes…Oh no. I'd forgotten about them.

"Oh my god." She whispered after a long silence. "I…don't believe it. They're real? They're…you." She closed her eyes and shook her head. "Why did Simon ask you to kill him?"

I frowned. "He didn't want to be a bloodsucker anymore, I guess."

Her eyes widened. "A bloodsucker? Like a…a…"

"A vampire, yes. Oh wait…You didn't know, did you?"

She shook her head, and I felt so sorry for her. Then she took a deep breath.

"I knew you were different. All of you. I read about what you are in a book…about Shadowhunters. She stared at the ground. "That's what you are, right?"

No one said anything. She just sat there and cried, until she passed out from exhaustion. I exchanged worried glances with Alec and Isabelle, picked her up, and did the only thing I could think of. I took her to the Institute.

**Sorry, this is a lot to take in. It felt necessary, though. Please review!**


	6. A Way With Words

I heard a familiar voice. My eyelids fluttered. I groaned. Everything hurt.

"Thank God. They said you were gonna wake up, but I wasn't so sure."

My eyes flew open. "Simon!" He was leaning over me, his eyes wide. I grabbed him up and hugged him with all my strength. He held on for a moment, and then backed away cautiously. I frowned.

"I'm just gonna get his over with. Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you about this before...I didn't want to be around you anymore because it wasn't safe for you, so I avoided you. I didn't know it would be this hard, though. I went to the library, and I looked up vampires. I found out about Shadowhunters. I looked for some of them, and then I found this clan. I asked them to kill me. I didn't want to be a monster, especially if I couldn't be your friend, too. I just couldn't tell you. I was too ashamed. One of them grabbed me that night I told you about the Star Wars marathon, and bit me. I thought I would be okay. But then…I started to change…and the bloodlust, it was bad. I knew I should've told you when you barged into my apartment… And when the blond one called me and told me where you were, I came here as fast as I could."

I looked at Simon, I mean really looked. I'd noticed it before. He _was_ different. I just didn't know how different. His dark hair was shorter, shinier. His dark eyes kind of…sparkled. His teeth were straighter and whiter, and he was taller. He now had a clear complexion, he was paler, too. His voice was deeper and silkier. I'd never really thought about it until now, but Simon was pretty cute. I shook that thought out of my head, and came back to reality. Crap, so the whole thing wasn't a dream. I sighed.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" He asked.

"I missed you." I smiled. "Come here."

He smiled back and hugged me.

"Don't you ever avoid me again. I don't care what you are." Simon was Simon and I knew he wouldn't hurt me. He was just about to answer when Jace, Isabelle, and Alec walked in. Jace looked from me to Simon. "How touching." He said sarcastically, and we pulled apart. I glared at him. Though, he was beautiful, he was also cruel.

"When do I get to go home?" I asked.

"About that..." he said cautiously.

Jace's POV

After I brought her into the infirmary, I went into Hodge's study. Alec and Isabelle were waiting for me there. I walked over to one of the many red poufy chairs. They look like they'd be comfortable, but they're not. I sat down and looked at Hodge. He looked tired. It had been a long night.

"What are we going to do?" I asked Hodge.

"Send her home, I'd say." said Hodge.

Alec and Isabelle nodded to themselves. My jaw dropped. I had to say something. I had quit my job at Pandemonium, so I would never see her again. Not that it mattered…But I couldn't be a Shadowhunter and a singer, and I was kind of born to be a Shadowhunter. It was just for the money, even though it was pretty fun…. Alec and Isabelle got up to leave. I looked at Hodge.

"That's it? You looked it up yourself, she has Shadowhunter blood! And what if she tells? Did you ever think about that? So really it'd just be better to-"

"She isn't trained, she'd be a liability. And if she told, no one would believe her. It's not as though she has any proof. Maybe she just wants to go home, and forget all about this, all about us. Forget about you." Hodge said, bitterly.

I didn't even notice that Alec and Isabelle had slipped out of his study until I walked out the door myself. That couldn't _really_ be what she wanted…right? I mean…I'd never forget about her... I could teach her and train her; she could be almost as good as me. I walked down the long hallway and into my bedroom. I had this bad feeling in my stomach, one I'd never had before. I sat down on the bed and ran my fingers through my hair. It was getting long. Then I laid back onto my nice white comforter and drifted into unconsciousness.

Simon's POV

I was doing laundry, humming a new song the band cooked up, when I got the call. I reached for my phone on the dryer and saw that it was a private number. I frowned.

"Hello?"

"Hey, bloodsucker. We've got Clary here, if you want her." Someone said in a bored voice.

"Got Clary..? Where? Who is this?"

"Remember the three Shadowhunters you asked to kill you? I'm the gorgeous blond one. And we have Clary at the Institute. I'll give you directions, if you want."

"Can I talk to her?"

"She's unconscious."

"Um, why?"

"I'll just tell you when you get here."

He gave me the directions, and I hopped in my car, hoping this wasn't a trick and I'd end up getting raped or something. When I got there, Jace met me outside. I made a move for the door, but he stepped in my way.

"Why didn't you tell her you were a vampire?" He looked angry.

"Well I thought you were going to kill me…so I decided not to spring that on her just before I was killed. Why does it matter to you?" I said, not sure where he was going with this.

He blinked. "Well, I had to be the one to tell her."

My jaw dropped. He just stood there, being his perfect self. I closed my mouth and nodded. It took me a while to answer.

"How'd she take it?" I asked meekly.

"That's why she unconscious." He smiled smugly.

I sighed. "Can I see her now?" Jace nodded.

"One more thing." He said lightly. "Stay away from my neck, bloodsucker."

When we got to the infirmary, where Clary was located, I sat down by her bedside. I grabbed her hand, needing the comfort. Jace glared at our hands.

"Can I have some time alone with her?" I asked. Jace just kept staring at her, until I cleared my throat.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I said, can I have some time alone with Clary?"

He nodded, and looked at her one last time before leaving the room.

I looked over at Clary. She was so beautiful, even unconscious. Her wild red hair spread around her like a halo, her pretty pink lips parted and she sighed. I had no idea what I was going to say, so I figured I'd practice now.

"Clary, I'm sorry you passed out." Wow, I sure do have a way with words. Let's try that again.

"Clary, I'm a vampire. Oh, right you knew that already."

I tried this conversation several different ways. I finally gave up and just said, "Clary, I love you." It felt good to finally say it, even if she was asleep and couldn't hear me. Her eyelids fluttered. Had she heard me?

**Hey guys, thanks for being so nice! I've been busy lately and haven't had much time to sit down and write, so I wrote a longer chapter..Kinda. Well, please review and I'll update as soon as I can!**


	7. All Goodbyes Are Sad

Clary's POV

"What do you mean about that? Why can't I just go home?" I nearly shouted. Were they gonna kill me know that I knew their secret? Nah, they could've done it already…

"Well…" Jace looked back at Isabelle and Alec. They nodded at him, urging him to continue. He faced me again and took a deep breath. "Well, there's no easy way to ask this…but would you consider joining us?" He said weakly.

My jaw almost hit the floor. That was the last thing I expected him to say. I saw him smile at my shock.

"Join you as in…how?" I said slowly, staring at him. He was so beautiful, so serene, a light smile on his face. _I wish I could run my fingers through his hair_…I let myself drift.

"Clary?" Jace looked concerned and I realized he'd been talking to me. I shook myself and looked back at him, focused this time.

"Oh, uh, sorry. Now, what were you saying?" I said a little sheepishly. He smirked.

"Join us, as in become a Shadowhunter…" He said carefully.

I didn't say anything. A few minutes passed and I still didn't say anything. They were all looking at me expectedly. Jace frowned.

"I think this would go a lot faster if I talked to Clary alone." He announced. Simon glared at him.

Isabelle nodded and headed for the door. Alec stood there looking at Jace. It was sort of weird, the way he looked at him. Isabelle cleared her throat impatiently and reluctantly Simon and Alec followed. They closed the door.

Jace sat down in the chair next to me. Neither of us spoke for a while. Then he looked at me. His gaze made me feel tingly and warm. I knew he was waiting for an answer.

"So…I would have to fight demons?" I asked.

"Yup. It's good way to release tension." He grinned. "But first we would have to train you. You wouldn't fight them right away. Couldn't, actually. You could be great, but never kill a demon. Like Alec. And we have some pretty cool leather-"

"No." I whispered.

"No, what? Hey, you don't have to wear leather, even though it'd look fantastic on you." He said quickly.

"I don't want to be like you." I said slowly.

His warm gaze suddenly turned icy. He looked away, clenched his jaw. He swallowed and looked back at me. His eyes just looked pleading now. And sad. He looked at the floor. It made my stomach clench.

"Um, why not?" He said softly. He was still looking at the floor.

"I don't feel like risking my life for something that I'm not even sure is real!" His head snapped up and he looked hurt. "I don't know if I believe all this! I just want to be a normal person, with a normal life, and not someone who fight demons for a living. I mean, do you even get paid?"

He stood up from his chair.

"It isn't _about _the money. It's about ridding the world of demons, of evil!" He shook his head and calmed down a little. "I thought you were different. I thought…" He trailed off. "Why can you accept Simon? Why can't you accept me?" His eyes widened. He recomposed himself. "Why can't you accept what you truly are?" He said softly.

My jaw dropped. What I truly was? How could I be? We sat in silence for a long time.

"Can I please just go home?" I asked sadly.

He looked vulnerable, the first time I'd ever seen him that way since I'd met him. He looked into my eyes for the longest time. I studied his, too. They were shining. Then, he finally nodded.

"If that's what you really want." He whispered.

I nodded. He walked over and opened the door. Jace left, but Simon came in. He smiled when he saw me.

"You ready?" He asked.

"Yep." I plastered on a smile.

Jace-who had been waiting outside the door- led us outside. I told Simon to go ahead and start walking, since my car was parked at his place. He glared at Jace one last time, then turned around and walked. I turned my attention to Jace. I looked him over. I knew I probably wouldn't see him again. "Thanks for everything." I smiled sadly. He nodded. "No problem." I didn't know what else to say, so I stood on my tiptoes and hugged him. He wrapped his arms around me too. The embrace lasted forever, but not long enough. I pulled away. "Goodbye Jace." And then I walked away from him, and towards Simon.

Jace's POV

I watched her walk away from me, getting smaller and smaller. My stomach really hurt, and my eyes started burning. But, I just kept watching her. Then I whispered, "Goodbye Clary."

**Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews, they really keep me going! This is a sad chapter, sorry. I'll post another ASAP. Well, please review and I hope you like it.**


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